The Weekend Plans Post: Anniversary
Wednesday, Jaybird and I started the weekend off early by going out to dinner at the fast casual restaurant where, in a previous incarnation where it was a fancy tablecloth sit-down-at-a-table place (we mostly hung out in the booth-tv-and-paper-placemat bar instead), we had our first anniversary dinner. Same family running the joint, equally delicious food (although a smaller menu) — they just make more money this way so they changed models (and locations).
Sometimes when nineteen years have gone by in the space of about five, it’s nice to at least talk to the same waitress you talked to back then. And leave a 50 percent tip that you couldn’t have afforded back then.
Tonight I’m taking a half-day from work because I realized at the last minute that just-having-used-all-my-vacation-time-be-darned, I really didn’t want to spend the night of our 20th anniversary at work instead of with Jay, tomorrow we’re going out to the boonies to admire the new house of our dear friends who just bought a new house out in the boonies, and otherwise we’re both fervently hoping the weekend will be As Normal As Possible.
Because, for the last twenty years, as normal as possible has been pretty darn good.
So… what’s on your docket?
Sunday brunch for my mom’s 95th b-day. She lives in a nearby supported living place, so Karen will pick her up and bring her over, and our daughter will come by too.
Really looking forward to it.Report
One thing that 20 years of marriage has taught me:
While there isn’t a *PERFECT* correlation between smashing the cake in the other person’s face and divorce in the first few years, it’s a pretty dang strong correlation.
Same goes for gently feeding the other person without smashing and not getting divorced in the first few years.Report
Data point of one, but, IIRC, my brother and sister-in-law did neither, they just cut slices of cake for each other and then let the other person eat it, no feeding, no smashing. It is their 20th anniversary just before Christmas this year.
(I need not say they are still married?)
My weekend plans – I have to make Carne Machaca (I do it in the slow cooker) for a potluck on Sunday. Probably will go into the office for a bit tomorrow, I need to clean it up and I also should get the next few weeks’ worth of material updated.
Other than that, just relaxing. I gave (and graded) three exams this week so I’m a little wiped.Report
I was remiss in my first comment – Congrats to you both!
Our comparable restaurant went out of business years ago. It was decorated with huge so-bad-they-were-great murals of Greece. There were two waitresses, the middle aged one called everyone “Honey”, so we called her the same, the other was a younger woman, Tina, who always seemed sad. The food was always very good, and the prices cheaper than they should have been.
Yeah, those first few years can have a lot of challenges. Never noticed the cake thing though. You may be right. We were a gently feeding couple and have made it to 41 so far. The only really smashing couple I can think of barely made it to 6 months.Report
Thank you very much!Report
Congratulations! 19 years is a heck of a time. The wife and I celebrated out 13th a couple of weekends ago (it really was on Monday before, but I was out of town that weekend) with a very nice meal at a very walkable restaurant (woo hoo old neighborhood in a small town.) And getting through those first few was not a peach. But no cake mashed in the face for us.
No real plans for me, except getting over this damn cold. That and raking the fall leaves. And lighting the first fire of the year.Report
Thanks!Report
Mazel tov.Report
Thank you!Report
Conratulations to you both!
I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone smash a cake into someone’s face at a wedding. I don’t recall whether we actually fed one another cake or not. My uncle and aunt, whom I last saw 16 years ago at our wedding, recently crossed the Atlantic to visit. My mum served sacher torte – the same kind of cake we used for our wedding cake. My aunt remembered driving to the wedding from my parents’ place, in the hot car, with the cake in her lap, terrified it would melt and slide all over her dress.
In half an hour or so I’m going to head off to an ecstatic dance thingy – first of a monthly series that goes through to spring.
Tomorrow, heading to Calgary with some friends for a hippy rave-ish halloween party. Sunday night, visit Mr. T’s mum rather than coming all the way home, because my work on Monday is basically halfway back to Calgary, and only 20 minutes from Mr T’s mum’s place.
At some point I have to actually make my halloween costume.Report
Maybe it’s a Michigan thing but I’ve seen it happen at, oh, 50% of weddings.
(Ironically: the divorce rate? 50%.)Report
Congratulations! We celebrated our 38th a couple of months ago. Every time I read a piece or a comment thread about dating here, I just cringe at the thought. I’d have no idea how to even start.Report
“So… um… I can trade resources for emotional labor. Would you like to go work out and then we can trade shirts for an hour so we can make sure we’ve compatible pheromones?”Report
Hmmm… Things have changed more than I thought they would.Report
Plus ça change…Report
Hey, that’s wonderful! Huge congrats!Report
Thank you!Report
I’m a little confused; 19 or 20? In any case Congratulations!Report
20! We got married all the way back in 1998.
(We were so young!)Report
Congrats! Lots of October anniversaries these days.
We have a picture on our bedroom wall from our wedding and we got a really wide matte and had all the guests sign it. We sometimes marvel at how many of the couples are now divorced. I don’t recall the cake-smashing % but I would guess Jaybird’s theory has some validity. I made it clear to my wife before the wedding that I did not like the cake smash thing and would not be doing so. When it comes to mischievous impulse control, I occasionally compare her to Lucy with a football, so I really wasn’t sure how it would go until that moment. Thankfully we had peace and we celebrate our 14th on Tuesday.Report
Thank you!
(I guess I’m pleased that there are a handful of people who have never heard of the cake smash. The cake smash was one of the things that I remember my parents complaining about as they drove home from a handful of weddings back when I was a little kid.)Report
Congratulations, you two! We hit 27 about a month ago solely because there was no smashed cake on our wedding day.Report
Thank you!Report
Congrats!Report