someday
So today someone I know from high school came out on Facebook, and from what I understand, this was the first situation where he’s really come out as gay at all. It was great to see someone make that kind of a difficult decision and express himself in a way that he felt was constructive for his life. And it was really encouraging to see all of the positive comments and support that he got on his Facebook page.
But he’s involved in local politics in my hometown, and he lamented the possibility that his political career would be ended by coming out. My hometown is a special, progressive place, so I hope that isn’t true. And I hope that my state is blue enough that it isn’t true state-wide in the near future. And I hope my country has the capacity for enlightenment and progress necessary to evolve quickly enough that gay people of his generation aren’t frozen out of national politics. There’s been a lot of setbacks, and a lot of forward progress, and a lot of work ahead. After California and Prop 8 I stopped predicting that the victory was going to come soon. I realized, and I realize now, that whatever advantages we have, they are not enough to rest on our laurels and rely merely on the arc of history.
Someday, though, the oppression and bullshit is going to end. Someday this country is going to fully and unapologetically extend basic American civil and human rights to gay men and women, and that means gay marriage, gay adoption rights and the right to serve in the military as openly gay. Someday this country is going to take the next crucial step in totally living up to its democratic and egalitarian ideals. And when that happens, the people, ideologies and parties that obstruct this progress will look back at that behavior and see that it is as embarrassing and shameful as the long history of support for racial segregation looks now. Now you can get on the bus, you can stand in the way of the bus, or you can get out and push, but the course of this country is bent towards eliminating the structural challenges to gay equality. If you need to prepare yourself for that, I suggest you do so. Because change is coming.
The present administration and congress seem to be the best proponents, and this the best time, for huge advances, since the Democrats are in control. I suppose Obama is waiting until after healthcare reform is over to begin investing energy and burning up his capital on gay rights. But the time is right for a concerted effort from the Democrats to make something happen.Report
I’m not sure that “some day” is the right way to phrase it. The process will be gradual and will consist of many different days over a very, very long period of time. It will happen in different regions and amongst different groups over long spans of time. And because it will happen this way, it will be the sort of change that lasts.Report
My personal guess is that DADT getting consigned to the trash heap will be a big first step. Historically official integration in the military helps minorities a lot because it makes them into patriots. Of course gays have always been in the military but when DADT gets the cut (and all sources and signs I’ve read say that that particular turkey is very clearly getting measured for its appointment with the butchers block) they’ll be able to serve openly and unapologetically. Morally of course this will be a big step but in terms of image and PR it’ll be a huge advancement as well.Report
I’ve long suspected that the issue was not a question of “if” but “when”. My take was on “what’s the quickest way to get from here to there?”
Will doing it this way take 20 years and that way 50 and this other way 10? We should take this other way, then.
I was very disappointed when Maine voted it down. That was one of the cornerstones of my “this other way”. Sigh.Report
Sitting here in Maine, unmarried and unable to change it, I certainly hope a way can be found to right this particular wrong expeditiously. Relying on the good will of the people certainly didn’t pan out so well.
Thanks for this, though, Freddie. It’s encouraging to know that we enjoy the advocacy of people such as yourself.Report
So today someone I know from high school came out on Facebook, and from what I understand, this was the first situation where he’s really come out as gay at all. It was great to see someone make that kind of a difficult decision and express himself in a way that he felt was constructive for his life [on Facebook].
Chalk this up as another piece of evidence that Facebook is the phoniest place to approximate (non-romantic) intimacy and friendship. My decade old claim that online chat rooms were mainly for people with mental health issues seems to have greater applicability.Report
Boo! Hiss! I met my boyfriend and now Husband in a chat room 10 years ago now.Report
If it makes you feel better, I flew to meet a girl I met online. No bliss for us though.Report
Maribou and I met online back in the mid-90’s when only crazy people did such.
We read each other’s essays.
Sigh.Report
Man that’s awsome!Report
It was a much better story in 1999 than it is now.Report
Hey, I love that story. While you and she were reading each others essays me and mine were exchanging phone numbers for like the first time. Small world indeed.Report
It was his decision, and his choice of how to go about doing it, and I respect both.Report
Your statement would be more significant if I had any indication that there was a way he could have gone about it that wouldn’t have warranted your respect.Report
Your statement would be more significant if I felt that you’ve said anything at all worthwhile.Report
So today someone I know from high school came out on Facebook
Exhibitionistic, and most distasteful.
It was great to see someone make that kind of a difficult decision and express himself in a way that he felt was constructive for his life.
Is this the usual criterion you employ when evaluating ‘expressions’? (Memo to secondary schools in Connecticut: be wary of this applicant).
And it was really encouraging to see all of the positive comments and support that he got on his Facebook page.
By people with no sense of manners.
But he’s involved in local politics in my hometown, and he lamented the possibility that his political career would be ended by coming out.
A man of 28 entering electoral politics for a career? Another Barney Frank. Luscious.
And I hope my country has the capacity for enlightenment and progress ….
To chuckle at cliches.
Someday, though, the oppression and bullshit is going to end. Someday this country is going to fully and unapologetically extend basic American civil and human rights to gay men and women, and that means gay marriage, gay adoption rights and the right to serve in the military as openly gay.
None of what you name has ever been an enforceable entitlement. The purpose of adoption law is not to please aspirant adoptive parents, but to see to the care of the young in the best setting you can manage. Matrimonial law provides formal demarcation and buttresses for natural social architecture. It’s purposes is not to provide people with baubles. The military fights wars; it is not properly disfigured for anyones political hobby horses.
Someday this country is going to take the next crucial step in totally living up to its democratic and egalitarian ideals. And when that happens, the people, ideologies and parties that obstruct this progress will look back at that behavior and see that it is as embarrassing and shameful as the long history of support for racial segregation looks now.
I expect I will get to the end of my days with many regrets. Casting a ballot against this burlesque will not be on the list.Report
Where’s @jaybird crying “troll” when you need him?Report
Dude, I don’t think I use the term “troll” outside of a D&D context. That was someone else.
My gimmick is anecdotes and caustic wit.Report
Sorry, @Jaybird … I was thinking @Cascadian … I apologize. I blame my recent arrival.Report
It’s all good my man. You probably just asked “which one is the obnoxious one again?”, came to the conclusion that it was me, then figured that I was the obnoxious one in that previous interaction you had.
Perfectly understandable mistake.
No harm done.Report
Good.Report
Dang, missed my cue. TROLL, TROLL. Urgh, I’ll try again next time.Report
The wardrobe malfunction was my fault. We’ll nail it next time.Report