Concern Expressed over lack of Thunder for offense!!
The downward spiral of points for the Thunderlips Express continued this week as they scored the lowest amount of the season for the team. Even so, Team Sandcastle opened the gates for a win by all but one player scoring below their projected points, still, the Express refused to sally forth and left their win on the Ben-ch. Tu caught up the despondent coach.
Tu: Wow, coach that was a brutal game.
Dman: Argh, I hate it when I leave the win on the bench.
Tu: So, why did you play Rivers over Rapis… er… Roethlisberger?
Dman: Rivers had been playing so well, I thought he could keep it up.
Tu: Bad call coach, you should have paid more attention to the defenses that they were playing against. You would have seen the bad matchup the Chargers had.
Dman: More Mond… Sunday morning quarterbacking from you, Tu. How are your fantasy teams doing?
Tu: I ask the questions here coach, and it is the evening.
Dman: Shut up, Tu!
Freak and Peak of the Week
Some are starting to cry foul that Jesus was able to draft players. Prosecutors are claiming inside information. While these charges are being reviewed though, the team racked up impressive outings from another Holy Cow! Trinity in Flyod, McCoy, and Lynch to Maliciously beat down the opposing team by 59 points. So much for turning the other cheek.
Reek of the Week
Tebow blessed the Intangibles again with playing the worst team in the league. The Hardly Trying played two bye week players and one that was known to be out with an injury. Most of coach Jaybird’s team Scorned points as usual with one wide receiver rocking their own donut. Tu talked with the lucky coach.
Tu: Another win coach. I guess you are proving the saying, “I’d rather be lucky than good.”
Jaybird: I admit that it may look like we’ve had a lot more Kyle Orton quarterbacking this season than Tim Tebow, but when you’re fighting against various Belichicks, you’ve got to console yourself with knowing you’ve won the moral victory.
Tu: So instead of being a coinflip team, you’re…?
Jaybird: Undefeated.
Tu: So you’re not a coinflip team, then?
Jaybird: On any given Sunday…
Tu: (interrupting) that was last week.
Jaybird: Oh, right. Um. Well, if you’re stuck looking at the scoreboard, you’re not getting the whole picture. Look at the individual stats, sure… but you also have to look at…
Tu: Dramatic pauses?
Jaybird: The Intangibles
Tu: It’s a pity that you couldn’t close the season with that.
Jaybird: Perhaps I still will.
Weak of the Week
You know it is going to be a bad game when five players on one team scored no points and the team almost wins the game. The Nine, Ten, Eleven almost pulled off the ultimate win using their renowned offensive strategy of not playing with all nine players. But the Warriors were barely able to limp across the finish line with the win.
The Oracle Update:
Another bad week for the Oracle as two more teams have strayed from the predictions and another team is poised to be lost.
The Tryhards: 9W – -7L aka: Rocking the Donut
Acme Packers: 1W – 1L
WhoWouldJesusDraft?: -3W – 5L
Team Pooh Bear: 4W – -2L aka: The Fallen
Partisan Warrior’s: 2W – 1L – -1T
Brian’s Best Team: 2W – 0L aka: The New Anointed Ones
Reba Demartino: 1W – 1L aka: Gin-soaked Dreamers
DownSouth Dragons: 0W – 2L
The Uninitiated: 5W – -3L
MaliciousProsecutors: -1W – 3L
Merciless Monsters: 3W – -1L
Scorned Intangibles: -1W – 3L
Thunderlips Express: -1W – 3L
The Levellers: 3W – 0L – -1T
Team Sandcastle: -3W – 5L
The Nine Ten Eleven: -3W – 5L aka: Read Between the Lines
