Fantasy Football Week In Review: Week 3

Merciless Beating by Thunderlips with Monster game from Decker!

Thunderlips Express can finally chalk up a win after needed 34 point scored by Julius Thomas and Eric Decker. Thankfully, the Broncos showed no Mercy to the two headed Monster of Oakland’s running attack and defense. This allowed Decker to score 30 point just by himself and lead Thunderlips to the winning Express lane. Tu Caught up to a jubilant Coach Dman.

Tu: Congratulations on your first win coach.

Dman: It was a close game, but the team pulled it off. I bet you cannot say any bad about this week.

Tu: Hrm, would you like to comment on you underperformance of you two highest draft pick in Bryant and Green? Are you a little concerned?

Dman: Sigh, of course you would pick up on that…..

Weak and Tweak of the Week

Reba Demartino seems to have celebrated their win last week over the Anointed Ones by drinking copious amounts of Gin and it was Soaking them through and through because they stumbled to the third lowest point total for the week. This seems to have caused a mid season name change, hopefully they will enter AA and get this problem fixed quickly. Luckily their Dreams came true, they channeled their inner Tebow, and played one of the only two teams that scored South of that amount. They knocked the opponent Down to 2-1 because of a Drag On their score by Victor Cruz being on cruise control through one of the most pathetic games the Giants have ever had.

Freak and Peak of the Week

The roller coaster ride for the Intangibles continued this week as the Scorned Tangible points, while the Acme Packers packed on the points to score the highest amount for the week…. And the biggest blowout for the week. The wildest part of the scores is that every single player under performed for the Scorned Intangibles this week. Let’s talk to the Week in Review’s resident Expert to gain greater insight into the game. Expert, “It is never a good idea to ply the team that scores the highest points in the week.” Very good point, Expert! Now Tu caught up to Coach Jaybird.

Tu: {Smug grin} Tough loss coach. The Intangibles of your team did not seem to help much this week.

Jaybird: We saw this play out a couple of seasons ago as well. Sure, Tebow might lose to the proverbial Patriots, but we’ve still got our eyes on the playoffs.

Tu: Was Tebow your player of the week? He scored just about as many point as the rest of your team this week.

Jaybird:  The way I see it, we’re dealing with something more than just variance here. I’m thinking that someone stole our defensive signals. And, from the looks of it, offensive signals. I’ve written a letter to the commissioner to see if we can’t have our stats tweaked to a pre-signals-stolen state.

Tu: There were more than a dozen games being played! You don’t really have a team!

Jaybird: No, Tu… thanks to Tim Tebow, we really do have one.

Tu: {Sputter} That’s it! Get me out of here!

The Oracle Update:

The Oracle was on track this week and still has not lost another team. That is saying something when they one team to put up a big goose egg. It only takes one lucky week.

The Tryhards: 9W – 1L
Acme Packers: 7W – 3L
WhoWouldJesusDraft?: 3W – 7L
Team Pooh Bear: 9W – 1L aka: The Anointed Ones
Partisan Warrior’s: 8W – 3L – -1T
Brian’s Best Team: 8W – 2L
Reba Demartino (aka Gin-soaked Dreamers): 4W – 6L
DownSouth Dragons: 4W – 6L
The Uninitiated: 8W – 2L
MaliciousProsecutors: 3W – 7L
Merciless Monsters: 4W – 6L
Scorned Intangibles: 3W – 7L
Thunderlips Express: 4W – 6L
The Levellers: 5W – 6L – -1T
Team Sandcastle: 2W – 8L
The Nine Ten Eleven: 0W – 10L aka: Rocking the Donut