If you had an opportunity to have a star added to your stomach, wouldn’t you take it? Even if it meant that other people could have them added? Would you have your star removed, just because other people started having stars?
Jaybird
Jaybird is Birdmojo on Xbox Live and Jaybirdmojo on Playstation's network. He's been playing consoles since the Atari 2600 and it was Zork that taught him how to touch-type. If you've got a song for Wednesday, a commercial for Saturday, a recommendation for Tuesday, an essay for Monday, or, heck, just a handful a questions, fire off an email to AskJaybird-at-gmail.com
Thanks to your generosity, we were able to upgrade our service plan. Hopefully this will help us address some of our performance issues.
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyNormally we’d have some sort of peace agreement after the war ends which includes national borders.… on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyNot signing the treaty means they weren’t bound by it. To the best of my knowledge we’ve passed no l…
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyWrite down אמת on some clay. Then remove the aleph. on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty"land that changed hands in wars" How many times did you have to rewrite that particular phrase?
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyJews don't have to do anything with regards to the fringe left. As a friend of Jews and their state… on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltySure to all that, but what I am referring to in the West Bank is not questions of ownership. What I'…
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyThe pro-Palestinian movement does a lot of motte-and-bailey. No one is in favor of "ethnic cleansing… on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyI am pointing out that we need different words to describe what is going on. If we use normal rules,… on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death PenaltyLee: I emotionally don’t like the idea of the Palestinians getting rewarded Whatever happens won't b…
on Weekend Plans Post: Recovering from the HolidaysHere is a picture of Raquel Welch as Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island to start your weekend: https://…
Alone at Last or The Curse of a Sleepy Eye
December 26, 2024
December 25, 2024
A Christmas Eve Two-Pack of The Days of Real Sport
December 24, 2024
Even on Christmas Somebody is Always Taking the Joy Out of Life
December 23, 2024
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Open Mic for the week of 12/23/2024 on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty
on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty on Joe Biden Agrees that Some People *DO* Deserve the Death Penalty
Sweet googly moogly.Report
I’m going the Bowie/cheapskate route and just getting one done.Report
Weird. Didn’t know that about eye color though.
It’d be weird to look into a mirror and see blue eyes staring back, though.Report
Meh. I’m saving up for a Uvula enhancement.Report
My eyes are already blue.
Fuckers trying to steal my edge!Report
Now that you mention it, I absolutely should have asked the “what if you already have a star on your belly” question.Report
Relax, I think its going to be years or even decades before this outfit is in operation.Report
Mmm, my eyes already change color between blue, green and grey.Report
If you’re either of my siblings get off of my site!Report
For some reason, I’m surprised you have siblings. I always imagined you as an only child for some reason.Report
Did they see the Boys from Brazil?
I like having brown-green eyes.
Fishing AryanizersReport
If I wanted to become Jewish, how difficult would it be?
Is there an operation I could undergo?Report
Yes, but they prefer it done on the 8th day.Report
Jaybird, the answer it depends but the process of becoming Jewish is usually fairly difficult for a variety of theological and sociological reasons. Theologically, Jews saw no needs in making gentiles Jewish because ideas about life after death were fuzzy at best and it was generally assumed that God wouldn’t punish gentiles for being gentiles. He created them to. Therefore, the Rabbis adopted stringent standards for conversion during Talmudic times. A gentile who wanted to become a Jew most not have mecurial aims, including wanting to marry a Jew, must accept the “yoke of heaven” and agree to follow all the laws of the Torah, have a ritual immesion in a mikveh, and if a man get circumicized.Report
must accept the “yoke of heaven”
But I thought you shouldn’t convert just for the yokes….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mV7m6IIN_tIReport
“It offends me as a comedian.”Report
I have put a bit of thought into this, as I too have considered converting to Judaism.
First of all, I would like to kill the baby Jesus. Secondly, I am already circumcised.
So, I’ve got the two biggies out of the way . . .
It’s the beard.
I have difficulty getting a decent goatee going.
And there are at least seven different colors of hair in my beard. In fact, it might be half an inch over or more until another hair of the same color occurs.
Maybe there’s a Reform movement somewhere that would allow falsies.Report
Will,
you don’t need a beard to be Jewish.
(I think even Muslims have it as “recommended” simply because Mohammed wore one).
I should like to see a picture of said multicolored beard.Report
That’s going to add a whole new wrinkle to the Blue Eyes puzzle.Report
I had a friend who would wear one colored contact until people noticed that he “had two different colored eyes.” Then he would switch which side he wore it on.Report
Your friend is awesome and I would subscribe to his newsletter.Report
The no-frills version is a dozen cases of cheap booze, to turn them permanently red.Report
By pouring the booze directly on the eyes? because drinking a dozen cases is not going to make your eyes permanently redReport
I don’t think anti-freeze turns eyes permanently red.
… you haven’t been drinking the same cheap booze I have, have you?Report
I have a black hole in my . . .Report