LOOG Week in Review – Week 4
Oh thank heaven for Nine, Ten, and Eleven!
Two, four, six, eight!
Who do we appreciate?
Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven!
Their so nice, win are given!
In an amazing show of charity, Coach Chris decided to not play an entire team. Yes! He did not play Eleven, or Ten, he even did not field the normal Nine! Instead he fielded seven. Then an aged stone gathered no Moss as Santana took the team’s nickname to heart and Rocked the Donut himself. To make things worse, the Express put up their most points in four games. This gained Thunderlips the Freak of the Week with an 80 point blowout. Tu caught up with Coach Dman.
Tu: You won again coach.
Dman: Yeah! That was a beating!
Tu: So you are proud of beating a team that did not field a full team? I expected better of you.
Dman: A win is a win, Tu. This was a complete victory. Nothing went wrong.
Tu: Oh? Are you becoming concerned now about the poor performance of Green for three weeks in a row? He was your top pick.
Dman: Can’t you ever say something nice?
Tu: Just stating the facts coach.
Squeak and Reek of the Week
In a stunning lack of points, the Malicious Prosecutors barely won with the fifth fewest points, but pulled a Tebow and played the team Levelled with mediocrity. They score the third fewest point. Still, it took the Malicous play of Drew, to Brees by with a win.
Peak of the Week
Acme Packed on the point this week and Initiated his opponent to a 60 point beating. Tony Gonzalez looked like Speedy Gonzalez running circles around the Sylvester the Cat defense of New England. While six players of the Uninitiated looked untrained, unmotivated, uninspired and scored well below what they should have.
Bleak of the Week
Scorned again for points, the Intangibles fell to the Best Team. The only player to Foster any hope for the Scorned ones could not overcome the Royal pain of five players under performing. Tu caught up to Coach Jaybird.
Tu: Another bad game for you coach. Don’t you think that the bench spot Tebow is taking up could be used for a more productive player?
Jaybird: This wasn’t Tebow’s fault. There were a lot of points left on the bench.
Tu: But the team you posted didn’t score enough to actually *WIN*.
Jaybird: Ah there’s the nut of the problem. The team I didn’t post did post enough to win. This was a coaching failure. I’ve written the commissioner and asked for official acknowledgement of Tebow’s accomplishment.
Tu: {Sputter} That’s it! Get me out of here!
The Oracle Update:
Emergency! Emergency! The Oracle is about to lose two teams. The Tryhards look to be hardly trying to win games and Team Pooh Bears’ players are looking like and out of shape stuffed animal. The Oracle said both were going to be some of the best teams in the league.
The Tryhards: 9W – 0L
Acme Packers: 6W – 3L
WhoWouldJesusDraft?: 2W – 7L
Team Pooh Bear: 9W – 9L aka: The Anointed Ones
Partisan Warrior’s: 7W – 3L – -1T
Brian’s Best Team: 7W – 2L
Reba Demartino: 3W – 6L aka: Gin-soaked Dreamers
DownSouth Dragons: 4W – 5L
The Uninitiated: 8W – 1L
MaliciousProsecutors: 2W – 7L
Merciless Monsters: 4W – 5L
Scorned Intangibles: 3W – 6L
Thunderlips Express: 3W – 6L
The Levellers: 5W – 5L – -1T
Team Sandcastle: 1W – 8L
The Nine Ten Eleven: 0W – 9L aka: Rocking the Donut
Yay for Drew Brees! A W is a W, baby!Report
Yep, Tebow intangibles to the rescue.Report
Three quick comments:
1. This is the first week that I have been fully aware, before the games even started, who the actual person was I was playing against. I am therefore especially excited about the prospect of kicking my opponent’s cute, young, overly-talented, New-York-based butt.
2. Speaking of butts, I say once again: the Oracle can totally kiss mine. “Losing record,” my ass.
3. Using my 17 year old son to help me draft was a genius move. In the future, I recommend this strategy to everyone. If you don’t have a 17 year old son, I would highly recommend renting one over draft weekend.Report
Heretic! The Oracle knows ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Though I am a heretic too. I do not think the Oracle had a clue for some people.Report
Though I am not sure about you starting a Jacksonville player though. I think he will only disappoint.Report
He did not disappoint.Report
As I look at the game this week’s slated
I’m quite sure that the big ‘O’s mis-weighted
With your term infirm
I prepare the worm
And go into Sunday with breath baited.Report
And with that out of the way, this is the second year where my team is full up with P, P, P, Q, P and Os out the yin-yang.
The only uninjured players I have are on a bye.Report
P is nothing to worry about.Report
Yeah, yeah. “It’s sterile.”Report