Dispatches from the Twilight Zone
A funny thing happened yesterday: Our house ceased to exist. In fact, our entire street.
On Google Maps, I mean. Put in our address and… nothing. Clancy was trying to map out her route to work, and this complicated that greatly.
Which led me to fear that our house did not, in fact, exist. So I went outside and looked. Huh. Still there. I looked at the street sign, and it was also still there.
I got some external validation when I went on Mapquest and it found the house easily. Whew.
Except when I thought about it, Mapquest has never been particularly reliable…
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Can you still see it in Google Earth?
I mean, if you’re in one of the zones that the government doesn’t want visible from space, you’re pretty much boned. Get directions starting from the 7-11 down the street and always just go get a slurpee before you go anyplace new.
But that’s just good advice anyway.Report
If movies tell me anything, this means that you are about to enter a fast-paced thriller and uncover some grand conspiracy.Report
Cool. I need something to blog about.Report
He’s starting to realize that eternal fate has turned its back on him.Report
Mmm, I think that only happens at 2 AM…Report
Not coincidentally, also the best time for a Run for The Border.Report
You’re certain you aren’t above a top secret military installation?Report
How would he know?Report
Well, one of the signs was “Google takes your house off google maps”
… the other was suspiciously high resolution imaging where it’s not supposed to be (middle of africa).
… google probably shouldn’t have FOIAed the military satellite maps. Just sayin’Report
The road I grew up on is an old, historic road–most has fallen into ruin, been built over, or even just renamed, but there are two sections that still bear the historic road name.
I live on one of the sections. The one people in my town knew about was the other one. Whenever we gave directions to our house, we had to explicitly tell people that it wasn’t the road they were thinking of (and even with explicit instructions, they got it wrong half the time).
I had thought that modern mapping software had put a change to that. But apparently, Google Maps makes the same mistake. And so now we tell people to listen to our directions because the mapping software is off… and of course they still get it wrong half the time.Report
My house shows up on Google Earth and Google Maps, but my office’s address is very confusing to all three major mapping programs. I can physically see my office and physically see the street, but the programs all jump us exactly two miles north onto another street with a different name.
But I can assure you that we exist; we’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out how Google will rank the firm on various internet search terms. And by “we” I mean one of the managing partners, not me.Report
Does non-existence help or hurt property values?
Have you checked to see if your house is just in moderation?
Also, I’m going to go ahead and send you a copy of both Being and Nothingness and Truth and Existence. Think of them as home improvement guides.Report
More bad jokes:
If you stare long enough into the abyss, you end up moving there.
You may be living in a Calvino novella about the collapse of the housing market.
Your house may have simply stopped thinking.Report
Since Will T likes to redraw maps as a hobby, maybe this is just the incipient Google sapience casting a Halloween trick on him.Report
An observer (Google Maps?) tried to determine Will and Clancy’s house’s momentum to excessive precision.Report
Winner.Report
An update, the house exists again!
This post was meant to be humorous, but I was actually kind of concerned. The ability of people to find this house is tied in to GoogleMaps. Significantly. Nearly every bit of directions would have had to include – and hope it was remembered – “You can’t find it on Google Maps”
I hadn’t even thought of it this way before.Report
Just give them good, southern directions:
All right, so y’all are gonna drive down 96 until you get to the corner where Dairy Queen useta be, then take a right. Drive for 3 or 4 minutes, until you get to the fork in the road. Take the one that goes to the ol’ Johnson’s farm, and our house will be up there on the left, just past the crick.Report