Surely a sign of the Apocalypse…

Tod Kelly

Tod is a writer from the Pacific Northwest. He is also serves as Executive Producer and host of both the 7 Deadly Sins Show at Portland's historic Mission Theatre and 7DS: Pants On Fire! at the White Eagle Hotel & Saloon. He is  a regular inactive for Marie Claire International and the Daily Beast, and is currently writing a book on the sudden rise of exorcisms in the United States. Follow him on Twitter.

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30 Responses

  1. Patrick Cahalan says:

    Everybody was asleep.Report

  2. Jaybird says:

    This also means that, get this, I’m in the finals for our Fantasy Football league.

    I believe my record is 8-7.Report

  3. Dexter says:

    Don’t worry Tod, everybody in the New Orleans area thought the same thing when the Saints got good, but things are back to normal and all is well with the world.Report

  4. Mike Schilling says:

    You’re looking at this wrong. The teams that have beaten the 49ers are the Vikings, the Rams (0-1-1 against them, in fact), the Giants and you guys, while we’ve beaten the Pats and the Packers. Beating the 49ers just shows that you’re still not all that good.Report

  5. aaron david says:

    Yay! Someone else loves my Seahawks! That’s like, what, 2 people outside of WA?Report

  6. 37 points against (sorry, Mark) the Bills

    You say this as if it were a difficult feat to accomplish.

    I am however happy to see that the Bills’ decisions to trade Marshawn Lynch for 50 cents on the dollar and pass on the Second Coming of Doug Flutie in the third round last year (despite their fans’ demand that they draft said QB) are paying off for someone.

    In all seriousness, though, I’m legitimately happy for Seattle fans – outside of two hapless cities on Lake Erie*, no fan base has suffered more across all sports over the last . . . forever.

    *I had to look this up – the collective record of the three NFL teams that play in cities more or less bordering Lake Erie since the start of the new millenium: 214-407, two combined playoff appearances.Report

    • Mike Schilling in reply to Mark Thompson says:

      And the Bills are the most successful of those three in the Super Bowl era; the others never even made it to one (the only teams around for the whole time that haven’t),Report

  7. Burt Likko says:

    ** Ahem. **

    Your SeaChickens did not beat the Packers, Tod. Golden Tate did not catch that ball. M.D. Jennings did. That was not a touchdown.

    Ask Marshawn Lynch if you doubt me.

    I understand that there has to be finality and the ruling can’t be overturned and we all have to live with a blown call. But a blown call it was, which decisively changed the outcome of a close game and which contingues to tangibly skew the playoffs.

    Had the “Fail Mary” game been called correctly by the replacement refs, the Packers would have clinched not less than the #2 seed and a first-round bye at this point, and would have a chance for the #1 seed and homefield advantage throughout the playoffs with a win against Minnesota and a Tampa Bay upset of Atlanta. And the SeaChickens would be perversely rooting for Green Bay, as they would be vying against Minnesota for the #6 playoff spot.Report

  8. Mike Schilling says:

    Oh a completely different subject, there’s a great piece about the evils of torture over at TAC.Report

  9. Michael Cain says:

    The Broncos are one of the great mystery teams going into the playoffs. For every argument supporting the idea that they are as good as their record says they are, there’s a counter-point. And the other way around.Report

    • Stillwater in reply to Michael Cain says:

      The fact that they’re number one in starting QB QBR, first in the power rankings, and too-many-smart-people-to-name’s odds on favorite to win the Super Bowl is also a sure sign of Mayacalypse.

      Denver? Rilly?Report

      • Nob Akimoto in reply to Stillwater says:

        Imagine how much better they’d be if they’d kept a real quarterback like Tim Tebow!Report

      • Yeah, many people saying they’re good and Mr. Manning has great numbers, mostly because of the winning streak. OTOH, that’s come against inferior opponents — only two of the ten games in the current streak were against teams that will finish the regular season with a winning record. And the other teams in the AFC West only have twelve wins combined. Which one carries more weight?

        Denver played three games against this year’s other teams with the best records, and lost all three. OTOH, those were all early in the season, while the offense was learning a new system and a new QB, and the defense was learning a new system under a new coordinator. Which is more important?

        The Broncos lack a signature win against a very good team. OTOH, they’ve taken care of business and don’t have one of those ugly losses that the other elites have picked up in the last couple of weeks. Which matters?

        That’s why — even though I’m a fan — I think they’re a mystery team. Pick any of the reasons why the record matters or not, and you can make a fairly compelling case either way. They could go deep into the playoffs — but if they lose to the Patriots or the Texans before they reach the AFC championship game, no one will be particularly surprised.Report

  10. Steve S. says:

    Good post but have to argue with one statement: “a Bear’s team that usually kicks them to the curb as if they were practice dummies.” No, the Seahawks are 5-4 against the Bears in the last decade in spite of six of those games being played in Chicago. Only one of the losses was by a blowout margin. In fact, since we’re talking about Chicago, what’s that god-forsaken pustule on Earth’s buttock known for anyway? The wind blows? Ooh, how special. Oh, I forgot, they’re also known for mass slaughter of animals that were selected over millenia for docility. And criminal gangs.

    Now look what you’ve done, you had to go and mention Chicago.Report

    • Let’s ask Mr. Bierce what he thinks:


      A Married Woman, whose lover was about to reform by running away,
      procured a pistol and shot him dead.

      “Why did you do that, Madam?” inquired a Policeman, sauntering by.

      “Because,” replied the Married Woman, “he was a wicked man, and had
      purchased a ticket to Chicago.”

      “My sister,” said an adjacent Man of God, solemnly, “you cannot stop the
      wicked from going to Chicago by killing them.”
      Report

  11. Sam says:

    I posted this days ago and it didn’t take. Perhaps this website can only handle so much truth. That said, the reason the Seahawks are so good is that they’ve got a Mountaineer on their team.Report