No Country For Young Men? Nah, It’s Time to Grow Up

Garion Frankel

Garion "Gary" Frankel is a Young Voices contributor, and a Ph.D. student in PK-12 educational leadership at Texas A&M University, where he researches arts, civics, and humanities education. He also used to be involved in Republican politics, which means he loves complaining about all the things he used to have to keep quiet about.

You may also like...

4 Responses

  1. Jaybird
    Ignored
    says:

    Let’s try to force them to talk to therapists until they agree with the therapists and, if that fails to work, medicate them.Report

  2. Damon
    Ignored
    says:

    I can’t speak for “young men”, so this comment from “an old guy” who’s been married and divorced.
    I’ve dated women who were so full of drama the juice was not worth the squeeze. I have listened to them complain about their kids and their exes and all their problems, yet they don’t care about my problems. They just want to complain to someone. I have no interest in listening to someone complain all the time. I’ve met women who were LONG past safely having children but wanted to do it anyway, have surrogacy, etc. but they couldn’t afford to do it alone–others did it alone and wondered why they couldn’t find a guy to marry. Sorry, I’ll pass on the instant family. What part of “doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them” in my profile was unclear? I was on a “once in a lifetime vacation” with my then girlfriend, whose first though every morning and her last thought every night, was to post pictures of our trip on Facebook, and read the comments the next morning. Meanwhile I’m sitting outside watching zebras and giraffes wander by while I drink my coffee.

    Most women I’ve met have no understanding of real “hardship”. Example: I dated women who’ve had REAL problems. She was married and her husband went back to the old country and abandoned her here. She went back to get a divorce. If anyone found out she was “committing adultery” dating me while married, she’d would have been stoned to death. I’ve personally sat at the dinner table listening to two women talk about their and their family’s experiences in 1) Russia between the communist revolution to WW2 and 2) the Iranian revolution.Report

  3. Thibaut D.
    Ignored
    says:

    Gary, well written piece but it’s a stretch to imply that the difference between boys and men who succeed and those who don’t is humility. The “Andrew Tate” phenomenon is not why young boys struggle academically or get in trouble more at school, why they are less likely to attend or graduate from college, or experience social isolation. There are legitimate structural and biological reasons that advantage girls in school which should be addressed.Report

    • Gary Frankel in reply to Thibaut D.
      Ignored
      says:

      Appreciate you having a look!

      I agree that all that can and should be addressed, but they don’t tell the whole story. A lot of men (especially, but not exclusively, white men) end up in online subcultures that encourage them to see themselves as victims. They’re toxic, extremely self-destructive, and promote grievances against everyone else on the basis of race, gender, etc. Young men spend a LOT of time in these subcultures, and marinate in all sorts of delusions.

      Reforms in schools can help with the social problems you presented, but they won’t help mitigate cultural narcissism. There is a large segment of men that is simply resentful that they’re single, or that they have competition for the workplace.

      And only growing up can solve that.Report

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *