Breifly, On The Caterwauling Over How Meg White Bangs On a Drum

Meg White performing in 2007. Photo by I, Beninho, CC BY-SA 2.5 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.5>, via Wikimedia Commons

As interweb spats go, arguing over Meg White and her drumming is a welcome relief to bank runs, geopolitics, and whatever the hell it is that politician said about that thing in that way. It is a lesson in music being subjective. Or is it objective? Whatever.

Taking a page from Inigo here: “Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.”

Over at National Review, Dan McLaughlin proffered that The White Stripes song Seven Nation Army of Elephant of sporting events everywhere fame “has a strong case to be considered the best song of this century thus far,” which he himself admitted was a bold statement. Being a professional writer, he went on to extrapolate his point in detail, but what got this rolling online was when a pundit of some note referencing the article took a hard swipe at not only the song, but directly at drummer Meg White as “terrible” and “no band is better for having shitty percussion.”

No, I’m not naming that person. No, I’m not linking to it.

While the interwebs took multiple angles in dragging or supporting the hot take about Meg White and her ability or lack thereof, there is something of an unsolvable debate at the heart of this that gets to the magic and mystery of music in general. Very philosophy minded individuals can have long discussions over whether music is subjective or objective, and just about everyone understands that no two people can agree on anything, so let us start with a baseline of folks disagree. For example, I disagree with the premise Seven Nation Army is the best song of this century when it wasn’t even the best song on that album. But, I get the argument that Seven Nation Army has crossed over to the general population when a stadium full of people sing the main riff at every, and I mean EVERY, sporting event or gathering of any size these days. Valid arguments, valid opinions. Subjective. Or Objective. Or whatever.

However, when you move to Meg White and what the song would, is, or could be, now you are talking another matter altogether. Seven Nation Army as it exists forever in the great American songbook, or Spotify, or whatever replaces streaming later, is only what it is because of how it was made, recorded, and performed on that recording. Maybe Meg White isn’t Hal Blaine to some folks who want to get uppity about percussion, but she was the drummer on Seven Nation Army. It was her foot hitting the kick pedal for that Jack White nearly-brown-note down-tuned riff. It was Meg White playing drums on the whole track, that album, and all the other White Stripes songs. Taking her out, and it isn’t what it was, or is, or has become. Without Meg White, it ceases to be, and becomes something else.

Seven Nation Army works because it is a stripped-down, guttural roar of a song, with a feeling to it everyone can get a hold of. Which is why it is a sports chant by the masses for the ages now. Arguing what was needed was more “technical drumming” not only misses the point but shows a real lack of understanding why Seven Nation Army has connected to so many in the first place.

Technical prowess with an instrument is all well and good, but it isn’t everything. Jack White defended her by saying “her femininity and extreme minimalism are too much to take for some metalheads and reverse-contrarian hipsters…She can do what those with ‘technical prowess’ can’t. She inspires people to bash on pots and pans. For that, they repay her with gossip and judgement. In the end she’s laughing all the way to the Prada handbag store. She wins every time.”

Simple is a good thing. Tom Petty has kept generations singing along with three chords and a chorus. The KISS principle works every time you try it. The old adage for preachers to use “three points and a poem and/or joke” still works.

“No one plays drums like that!” the derisive criticism from the Twitter dot com crowd who mostly do not have drumming credits on hit records explains.

“It’s nice to hear drummers like Meg White – one of my favorite f*cking drummers of all time. Like, nobody f*cking plays the drums like that” Dave Grohl explained while listing off some of his favorite timekeepers.

Yes, no one plays drums like Meg White. That’s the point.

See there, we all found agreement. Subjectively. Or is it objectively. Whatever.