Thoughts from a Cemetery

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13 Responses

  1. fillyjonk fillyjonk
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    says:

    I am sorry for your loss. My own father died just over a month ago. I will not be able to go to his internment – he chose to be cremated, and his remains will be at a family plot in Michigan, more than 1000 miles from where I live. (We are doing a memorial service at Thanksgiving, when everyone can gather). (They also have a place saved for my mother in that family plot, even though it’s my dad’s family….and I hope it is a good many years before she joins him there)

    I don’t know what I will do about myself but I have to consider that. I have no spouse and no kids so there will be no one to need to visit me. I admit I’ve contemplated donating my body to science, if they will take it. I considered the Body Farm until a colleague told me what it was like and….yeah….no.

    I have visited a number of old cemeteries – a friend of mine is interested in both genealogy and in just the design of the old markers, and yes, it is more distinctive and more….personal, somehow.

    And I’ve seen interesting things in cemeteries – teddy bears, and balloons, and unusual flower arrangements but as you noted: “Some woman spent a lot of time and effort on that, to show her love for the person underneath,” I would never laugh at or deride a display that isn’t how *I* would do it, because of that very fact.Report

  2. Avatar Em Carpenter
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    says:

    I live across the road from one of those huge modern cemeteries with the flat, easy-to-mow-over stones, but my family back home are buried in an older cemetery like you describe. We have a monument with the family name, and then my grandparents, great grandparents and a great aunt are buried there. My dad will be as well- not sure about my mom. There were 8 spaces total, but somehow they buried a person in the wrong spot and now there is only room for one more instead of two.
    Anyway, the stones in this cemetery are works of art. There is one that is five feet tall and sculpted as a tree trunk. There was a spot where people would leave the old plastic flowers and wreaths when they brought new ones, and my grandma and I use to get them and put them on graves that had not been attended to in years.
    Lovely writing, thank you.Report

  3. Avatar Road Scholar
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    says:

    When my Dad passed, or maybe even before idk, they put up a husband-wife headstone. Thing is they assumed too much when they did so. My Mom’s name is engraved on it with “Born May 9, 1918 – Died [blank] 19[bb].

    She’s still alive, celebrated her 101st birthday this year. So making that date right is… well, I’m not sure how you fix that. I’ve seen markers where they tried to fill it in with something — epoxy, idk — but it really looks like crap.

    As for myself, the family plot, or at least the general area where my people are buried, is in the church cemetery. A church I haven’t stepped into in probably 30 years. Doesn’t seem right. Cremation I guess.Report

  4. Avatar Mike Dwyer
    Ignored
    says:

    My wife and I finally agreed on historic Cave Hill cemetery, here in Louisville. We’ll be in there with my great, great-great and great-great-great grandparents. We’ll also be neighbors with George Rogers Clark, founder of our fair city, Muhammed Ali and Colonel Sanders. Old cemeteries are awesome.

    https://www.cavehillcemetery.com/Report

  5. Avatar Zac Black
    Ignored
    says:

    Cutting-edge (at the time) medical science is the only reason I lived past the first couple months of my birth, so I feel morally obligated to donate my body to science in turn when I die. I’m really hoping to be one of those corpses that rips a real nasty fart as it’s being examined by a future med student in some anatomy class.Report

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