Thursday Night Bar Fight #8: The Darker Side of Higher Education in the 21st Century
Note: This post is part of our League Symposium on Higher Education in the 21st Century. You can read the introductory post for the Symposium here. To see a list of all posts in the Symposium so far, click here. This is part one of a three-part series.
Bad news, everyone!
The White House announced plans today to finally enact its New World Order. Our new overlords’ first task: homogenize all of the world’s schools. Home schooling, trade schools, do-it-yourself books, and all other private instruction and tutoring (including things such as music lessons, driving instruction and those cooking classes restaurants sometimes do) are henceforth illegal.
From this point on everyone in the world will learn the exact same curriculum. This includes all of our colleges and universities. In fact, the only kind of non-government teaching and learning that will be allowed by will be those skills and knowledge taught by employers to their own employees for the express purpose of doing specific jobs.
More bad news: Primary education will consist of roughly the same curriculum it does now in the United States, but thanks to the sluggish economy we will only be able to afford to have five majors taught in all of the world’s centers of higher learning. (Thanks a lot, Obama!)
The League has been asked to choose all five majors. The good news is that all five subjects will not only survive, they will thrive as never before. In fact, each will have something of a Renaissance and historians a thousand years from now will marvel at the advances achieved in such a short period of time. The bad news is that any subject not chosen will certainly fall into obscurity within a generation and be lost, perhaps for all time – unless of course it ends up being taught be employers.
And therein lies this Thursday Night Bar Fight quandary:
On which five college majors should we pin the hopes of the human race, and why? You must choose five, and if you attended college one of them must be your own.
There are, of course, some rules:
- Only those majors commonly available today are eligible.
- You may not combine common majors to make a single super-major (e.g.: Math, Science and Engineering)
- You should consider those skills and knowledge that the market may well take care of on its own, through employer-based teaching.
- Each nomination counts as a vote. As per previous bar fights, you may choose to up-vote or down-vote any other nominated major. We will announce the League’s chosen curriculum in Off the Cuff on Sunday.