The Rapture in Stereo

Jason Kuznicki

Jason Kuznicki is a research fellow at the Cato Institute and contributor of Cato Unbound. He's on twitter as JasonKuznicki. His interests include political theory and history.

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29 Responses

  1. Maxwell James says:

    Well, that was easily the best blog post I read today. Douglas Adams himself would be hard-pressed to match it. Nicely done!Report

  2. North says:

    Excellent post, I laughed. I wonder if it might need a page break though, what with it being lengthy.Report

  3. 62across says:

    I had planned to extend Memorial Day weekend by taking May 26th and 27th off, but now I’m thinking I should move those days off up a week. Just to be safe.Report

  4. Pat Cahalan says:

    I do believe that’s a fine chunk of writing there, good sir.Report

  5. ThatPirateGuy says:

    At first I was deeply amused and scornful of these people.

    Ever since confirming that some of them have done things like quit nursing school, quit their jobs and spend all of their savings to the point that they will have nothing on the 21st while having two kids my perspective has changed.

    I’m less amused 🙁Report

  6. James K says:

    “Apparently God hates observatories,” said Brahma. “Or perhaps he hates the Maori, but I kind of doubt that one.”

    The whole piece was gold, but that line in particular was hilarious, kudos!Report

  7. Samantha says:

    I’m going to commit that part about thinking less to memory! BRAVO!Report

  8. Jack says:

    Fantastic. Your dialogues are my favorite LOOG posts, and usually waht I use to refer people to the blog.Report

  9. fester60613 says:

    Too funny! Made my dull Friday (YAY!) morning far less dismal.
    To the point where I had to put a link to this on Facebook.
    Thanks for some good laughs!Report

  10. Lyle says:

    Of course as usual the folks with their prediction ignore that inconvenient fellow Jesus Christ who is said to have said No man knows the day or hour in Mathew 24:36. But of course the religious right does it all the time, just keeping the quotes they want to keep. I believe it was also said that the end would come like a thief in the night in Luke 12. As usual if the facts do not conform to the theory the facts must be discarded.Report

    • Jaybird in reply to Lyle says:

      No *MAN*.

      Maybe chicks could figure it out.

      Seriously, that’s how that one Nazghul guy bought it. The bad guy from Rock and Rule as well.Report

    • Jason Kuznicki in reply to Lyle says:

      On his call in show, people have asked Camping repeatedly about that verse. His answer is by no means original: At the time Jesus said it, it was true. But it’s not true anymore; the seven seals on the Book have been opened, and we are now finally able to understand its true meaning.

      Camping points to other verses suggesting that, in the end times, the true believers indeed will be able to “discern time and judgment.”

      Taken together, these verses form a recipe for as many doomsday predictions and splinter cults as you like. Including Camping’s, all those before his, and all those to come, world without end, Amen.Report

  11. tom van dyke says:

    The last incarnation of Vishnu, the Kalki avatar, will come in 2012, according to many reputable sources.

    Xtian fundies are fun to mock, but cults come in all flavors.Report

    • Jason Kuznicki in reply to tom van dyke says:

      My characters have all the biases you might expect them to have. I can’t deny it.Report

      • It’s cool. Needed to brush up on my Hindu eschatology anyway.Report

        • Jason Kuznicki in reply to tom van dyke says:

          You’ll note the conspicuous absence of the trimuti in discussions of social class. Things get embarrassing in a hurry when they show up.Report

          • My trinity can beat your trinity.

            Actually, I’d bet on the Trimurti in hand-to-hand combat. They got like at least 12 hands between them, sometimes more. The Trinity has 4 hands and a beak.

            (Didn’t quite follow yr remark about class [caste?].)Report

            • Jason Kuznicki in reply to tom van dyke says:

              (Didn’t quite follow yr remark about class [caste?].)

              I only meant that traditional Hinduism is inextricably tied to the caste system, which is unconscionable.Report

            • BlaiseP in reply to tom van dyke says:

              When it comes to hands, beaks, etc. I’d put the Three Stooges up against both of y’all’s trinities. Entropy generally wins these things. Chaotic good.Report

      • Chris in reply to Jason Kuznicki says:

        What I don’t understand, Jason, is why you focus on the more loopy elements in the dominant religion in our country (and by focus, I mean post something about it once every few blue moons), but never, ever say anything about the craziness of religions that, while they might have small to nonexistent footprints in our country, are dominant in some other country halfway accross the world! It’s almost as if you’re biased towards writing about stuff that might actually affect you or your readers, which would be disappointing. I am looking forward to your posts on the silliness of fundamentalist New Guinea animism to rectify this.Report

  12. Mike Schilling says:

    Damn, I have a trip planned for two weeks after the rapture. I hope enough pilots are heathens that the flights don’t get canceled.Report

  13. nath99 says:

    Did anyone see the picture of the controversial billboard that was recently put up by another spiritual group near Family Radio’s headquarters? It directly challenges them about May 21. Here is a picture of it:

  14. Barry says:

    One of the things which has amazed and discouraged me over the past few decades is the g lie which is pre-millenial dispensationalism. They lie and lie and lie, for decades, and there are always people who’ll suck up the lie that The End is Nigh.Report

    • BlaiseP in reply to Barry says:

      It’s not limited to Christianity. Iran is currently in the grips of Mehdi hysteria.Report

      • Barry in reply to BlaiseP says:

        The difference is that the USA seems to be and have been strongly influenced by this crap for decades. One could start as a 20-year old preacher ranting about how we are in the End Times, and continue that until one was was too senile for one’s staff to allow out in public, and it’d be All Good.Report

        • BlaiseP in reply to Barry says:

          Ecch, America’s religious kookery is in its DNA. But we’ve evolved a strategy for it, going back to William Penn. In a sense, it’s rather like a kid who never gets to play in good healthy dirt: he never gets exposed to all sorts of germs and therefore won’t develop the antibodies required for life in the open, if you will.

          Look at the colonies that did well and those that didn’t. The famous Puritans at the Massachusetts Bay Colony were swallowed up by heathens. Each new imported kookery had to move farther west to achieve a sufficient level of isolation, culminating with the Mormon exodus. In time, each such experiment failed.

          Iran is a different story. Once it had a thriving tradition of religious ferment, but the Boys from Qom have exterminated their Baha’i, persecuted their Sunni and Kurdish crypto-Zoroastrianism. Shiism only survives where it can oppress its own, they’re hated by most other Muslims for this reason.Report

  15. Rufus F. says:

    I’ve been renting a room in the states so I can wake up early and teach my class and then spend all day in the library and collapse in a bed without having to drive two hours back home. Anyway, one of my roommates is an unemployed, alcoholic meathead who talks constantly and watches these religious programs all night long. Meanwhile, the landlord and everyone on the first floor are Scientologists. The two of them had a loud argument about this the other night, with the meathead rambling about how Muslims are the locusts in Revelations, which proves, according to him, that the Mayan calendar is correct and everything ends in 2012, which for some reason he thinks most Christians believe. The landlord, who he was actually screaming this information at, kept very calmly saying, “No, Dave (not his name), you don’t understand: next year is when the extra-terrestrials will reveal themselves to us.” They kept asking me what I thought and I said, “Hell, I don’t care. Either way, I’ll be saving the rent money.”

    Anyway, this was very funny. I particularly liked “The map is too the territory”.Report